Ok so I just had a dinner date with one of my best friends. As usual we caught each other up on whats going on and how we’ve been, you know, dating, money, jobs, fashion, friends…stuff like that. We started talking about friendships we have and how sometimes you just have to let friends go. We are constantly growing and learning, and sometimes our “friends” are not growing at the same pace. Unfortunately they might be left behind. We reminisced on friendships we had in high school and how so many people have changed dramatically since then.
We then started talking about current friends and how sometimes there’s an underlying competition between friends…especially when it comes to success and dating. WHY IS THIS?! From what I’m hearing, there are friends out there that only form friendships with certain types of people to make themselves look and feel better about themselves. This is some BS! This is why my mother always told me to choose my friends wisely.
Ive heard people (especially females) make comments like “yea she can be in our circle shes pretty”, and I’ll admit that I have joked around like that. But I’m learning that there are actual people who feel that way and choose friends according to how they look, status, etc. Call me old-fashioned, but I like having friends that look differently, like different things, have opposing opinions and the list goes on and on. Part of why I love my friends and forming new friendships, is that I’m constantly learning new things and more about myself through my friends. If all my friends were exactly the same…I think I would have a miserable life.
Unfortunately, this conversation also made me look at some friendships Ive had over the years, and wonder if all of my friends have become my friends for the right reasons. I’d like to think I’m a pretty good judge of character and I dont take BS from people, so I’ve come to the conclusion that all the close friends I have now are in my life for a reason. I think I have weeded out the unneccessary friends that just brought drama to my life…and to that I’m letting out a big sigh of relief. To all my friends, I love you dearly, and even if I dont talk to you that often, just know that I always pray for my friends and I love you all! XOXO
I don’t mean to sounds biased but the status thing with friends I see in females more than dudes. The people I tend to call my friends have been around since the beginning of my adolescent years. People use the term friends too loosely. At the end of the day most of the people we meet are associates. We just force them into the box of friend.
Ya Dig
By: Fav Color on December 4, 2009
at 10:19 pm
I agree with the statement shes cute she can be in my circle lol sometimes it’s necessary, but i tend to look for the package, my friends have to be trustworthy, honest, nor jealous or envious, and cuteness doesnt hurt!! lol but honestly at this stage in the game, everyone in my circle of friend are diff, but we compliment each other to the fullest in every aspect of the word. I always surround myself with positive women/men, and i def let go of those who werent in the friendship for the right reasons. I luv all my girls and wouldnt trade them for the world.
P.S. good article Labellerochelle! xoxo
By: Miss K on December 4, 2009
at 10:36 pm
pick your friends like you pick your fruit, they say.
but it’s definitely true. there are those friends who won’t grow at our pace, and they must be left behind or carried. some, i’ve found, may be worth carrying for a while, but when they never learn to walk, i drop their ass off on the side of the road and keep pushing.
i don’t think anything is wrong with starting a friendship based on social status, but if that’s all you have, then you have no friendship at all. you have an associate – a business partner – a potential client or whathaveyou.
they said if you can count on one hand the number of true friends you have, then you are a LUCKY person. I am LUCKY.
and i am a TRUE friend back. there’s noone that can tell you that I wasnt there when they needed. and that’s what i look for.
i don’t make friends based on who they are – or who they will become. they are my friends because when i call – they answer.
BUT: labellerochelle, you are only my friend because of that van you used to drive.
By: Abednego Jones (D. L. W.) on December 4, 2009
at 11:14 pm
There is a thick line between friends and associates. People tend to get the both confused. And people who make friends to look cool are lost souls who have no control over their destinys or lives. They give that power to the new “friend” Just sayin…
By: Miranda on December 5, 2009
at 9:31 pm
don’t forget your awkward friends…btw…how would you define friend?
By: Lia on December 8, 2009
at 5:26 pm
I think a friend is someone that you love like a family member, youre there for them no matter what. A friend is someone you can talk to about anything, and they’ll give you their honesty opinion and advice. A friend gives CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM. I know my good friends will tell me when I’m being ridiculous or out-of-line because they care about my personal growth and they know my struggle to be the best me ever and they want to help me in that process. And I think all of my friends are awkward in some way…I’m awkward and thats what makes me love my friends, none of my true friends are alike.
By: labellerochelle on December 10, 2009
at 10:36 pm